"I'll take that under advisement, my darling." No he won't. Thomas takes his face in his hands, just holding there for a moment as James presses in against the curve of his shoulder and neck. I missed you, that touch says. He pulls the other man's face up and presses a kiss to his mouth, deep and ungentle and all those things they should learn to mediate (but won't). I miss you whenever you're so much as out of my sight.
There's playfulness in how he pushes James over onto his back, but he's intent in how he kisses him, along his jaw, his throat, to his chest. He could-- still be shattered into a million pieces, if he let himself. He could find this impossible. He doesn't want to. He can't be the person (or the lover) he was in London, but he can remake himself. He wants to so badly - as much as he wants James. Thomas only pulls back to sit up and drag his own shirt off over his head, skimming hands up James's belly and chest after, finding him so beautiful. Something forged in fire and tempered in salt-water. Something his, under his hands, alive and together.
Giving to Thomas is easy. It's a fixed point - a keyhole through which some other place with the same kind of happiness is as visible as this one. But his hands and his mouth and the ruddy lines of Thomas's tanned skin and the simple weight of his presence are all electric, warming present tense. He is so lovely, so sturdy and real, and loving the disparate and familiar shape of him is simple.
(Imagine a different version of this, a constant thought murmurs: there is no storm, no wreck, and the ship carrying Thomas reaches its destination and the man is swallowed up by the Americas, and they are both ghosts to each other, and--) He catches Thomas's hands, drawing one to his cheek. To kiss his palm. To trace the lines of fine bones and swollen knuckles. To cradle his fingers, to take the edge of Thomas's thumb gently between his teeth and press his tongue to calloused skin.
Maybe the reason this works despite how divided his attentions should be, despite Thomas's fine stark scars, is because this can be enough.
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blocks u
There's playfulness in how he pushes James over onto his back, but he's intent in how he kisses him, along his jaw, his throat, to his chest. He could-- still be shattered into a million pieces, if he let himself. He could find this impossible. He doesn't want to. He can't be the person (or the lover) he was in London, but he can remake himself. He wants to so badly - as much as he wants James. Thomas only pulls back to sit up and drag his own shirt off over his head, skimming hands up James's belly and chest after, finding him so beautiful. Something forged in fire and tempered in salt-water. Something his, under his hands, alive and together.
no subject
(Imagine a different version of this, a constant thought murmurs: there is no storm, no wreck, and the ship carrying Thomas reaches its destination and the man is swallowed up by the Americas, and they are both ghosts to each other, and--) He catches Thomas's hands, drawing one to his cheek. To kiss his palm. To trace the lines of fine bones and swollen knuckles. To cradle his fingers, to take the edge of Thomas's thumb gently between his teeth and press his tongue to calloused skin.
Maybe the reason this works despite how divided his attentions should be, despite Thomas's fine stark scars, is because this can be enough.